Oh Salvation Army Bell Ringers, How I Loathe Thee

For the most part, I really enjoy the holiday season. Fun presents, parties, friends and family, good cheer, that kind of stuff. However, there are a few parts of the holiday season that bug the crap out of me. My old nemesis used to be the Holidazzle Parade. When I first moved downtown, walking home from the Target Center when the Holidazzle was going on was a nightmare. It was almost impossible to cross Nicollet on foot, the skyway was always wall-to-wall packed (plus the skyway was less built up back then), and to go around it meant an additional eight blocks or so. Fortunately, between a couple additional skyways and a cordoned off path, the Holidazzle is no longer the impediment it used to be.

Now my main holiday annoyance is the ubiquitous Salvation Army bell ringer. In general, I am somewhat ambiguous towards the Salvation Army. Certainly they do a lot of good charity work, and I usually donate a lot of clothes, etc. every year. On the other hand, they do things like promote George Bush's faith-based initiatives in exchange for being able discriminate against homosexuals.

Anyway, let me first give kudos to Target Corp. for banning the geuzen from panhandling in front of their stores. It took a lot of balls to do that. I'm sure they knew they were going to catch a lot of grief, so obviously they must have had a good reason for doing it. And they did - most people hate the bell ringers. First off, that damn bell ringing is incredibly annoying and gives me a headache if I have to listen to it for more than a minute. Can you imagine working in a mall store that had a bell ringer stationed right outside of it for six weeks? I would go nuts. I can't quite decide where the bell ringer falls on the spectrum of beggery and shame-based extortion. Stop staring at me and trying to make me feel bad for not giving you the spare change in my pocket. Personally, I think I'm going to save that change up and buy some food for the local food shelf; you know, the one that DOESN'T try and shake me down ten times a day for a month and a half or spend half of my donation on administrative expensives?

UPDATE: Salvation Army bell ringers have hit a new low. In the IDS Tower, the bell ringer's bell does not have a ringer. The guy just stands there waving the bell back and forth with no sound because, well, there is no ringer. The first time I passed him I thought I was going deaf. Apparently the stores must have complained about the noise.