The Bachelor: Rome

Well, since nobody around here seems to be interested in serious topics, I thought I would serve up a slice of cheesecake for y'all today. Namely, a review of the ABC show The Bachelor: Rome. Last night was the season premier, and for those of you who have never seen the show the basic premise is that there is one guy (a.k.a. the bachelor) who gets to "date" 25 women, and eliminates some of them on each show until he is down to just one. In theory, they are supposed to get married and live happily ever after but my understanding is that these bachelor-shows are something like 0-for-3 on the marriage count (Mindy? Some help here?).

I actually liked the bachelor guy, Lorenzo Borghese (pronounced bore-gay-zee). Of course, the show constantly refers to him as Prince Lorenzo Borghese like anyone besides the crazy women on this show care. He seems like a nice guy, pretty down to earth, smart, successful largely in his own right. However, he seemed to completely miss one major point. At the beginning of the show he said that he does not like to bring up the fact that he is an Italian prince because then he gets all this attention from women who are only interested in the prince thing, not because they actually like him. Okay, that basically makes sense. But here is some advice for Mr. Borghese - if you are sick of women hitting on you simply because you are a prince, DO NOT go on the Bachelor. I mean seriously dude, have you never watched reality TV before? Don't you know what kind of people audition for these shows? Did you not think that ABC would beat the whole prince thing to death? I don't think the show went a single minute without using the word prince, or some derivation thereof.

Seriously, why do so many women go ga-ga over royalty anyway? I don't get it. In Lorenzo's case, the story is that 400 years ago or so, one of his ancestors was the Pope. This Pope woke up one day and decided that some of his relatives should be princes. Sorry, but I just don't associate nepotism with romance. Now, I can buy the fact that someone might find him intriguing because he has an interesting family history, but let's face it this entire show is based on some kind of princess fairy tale crap.

Topic for discussion: is it just me or is the bachelor just not THAT good-looking? I'll give him handsome, in an Ivy League sort of way. I thought he looked a lot like a Ken doll. Does anyone think that these women really thought that this guy was that attractive, or is this some kind of reality TV show strategy? Or was it that ABC just cut out any statement about his appearance that was not completely over-the-top?

Here are my two cents on a couple of the women:

ERICA: I can't believe he gave a rose to this chick. Here's clue number two: if someone actually says "I flew coach for the first time ever, just to be with you" run the other way. This is doubly true if this person lists her occupation as "socialite." Triple if she is wearing a fucking tiara.

AGNES: Wow, Agnes is gorgeous. She was one of the two surprise Italian women who crashed the show. I was glad she got a rose mainly because she is HOT HOT HOT. Okay, she seemed sweet and smart too, but so far most of what we know about her is hotness-related. Here's the problem though: she doesn't really speak English. Now, maybe she carries around an etch-a-sketch or something, but I think this inability to communicate might be a problem given the fact that he is speed-dating 25 women. In case you're wondering, this Italian prince does not actually speak Italian.

LISA: Lisa got the first rose from the Bachelor, which came with a pair of diamond earrings. She might turn out to be a flake, but I have to say I found her absolutely a-dor-a-ble. She got a little tipsy from the champagne, but when she took Lorenzo on a walk to hug a tree I was hooked. What a great smile. So cute!

Anyway, my thoughts on the other women he picked were that most of them were too skinny (that topic will be covered more in another post). Let me know if you guys have any thoughts on this travesty of social experimentation.